Day 8: Five Things That Are Most Important to You in a Future Mate
Five things that are most important to me in a future mate.
I’ll keep this short and sweet today to get it in just under the wire. I’ve always said that I want to find a man who 1) Loves God and 2) Loves to dance. My thinking behind that is that the man who I choose to spend my life with obviously has to love God first and foremost…and not just believe in Him or show up to church on Christmas and Easter…but to actually have a REAL, authentic, living, breathing relationship with Him. Because if he truly loves God and longs to serve Him as I do, that takes care of all the other biggies like loyalty, honesty, faithfulness, respect, kindness, etc. etc. And the reason I would love to one day marry a man who loves to dance is because whether he dances like Derek Hough or does the White Man Snap, Shuffle, & Lip Bite…chances are if he loves to dance, he’s fun, lighthearted, and doesn’t take himself too seriously. Plus, I just really love to dance. I think even if I met a man who was the worst dancer in the world; if he was willing to get out on a dance floor and break it down anyway, that would absolutely steal my heart!
Because today’s question asks for the top five qualities I look for in a future mate, I’ll go ahead and flesh out the rest of the list:
1) Loves God
2) Loves to dance
3) Has a creative outlet (This is SUPER important to me. I don’t care if it’s painting, dancing, writing, singing, producing, photography, etc. – because I am such a lover of creativity, I would have a hard time relating to someone who doesn’t have a passion for the arts in some way, shape or form.)
4) Makes me laugh
5) If he’s a book/movie nerd like me – that’s a MAJOR bonus! 🙂
Most of all, though…I just want to find my “person.” The one who GETS me. The one who when he takes my hand for the first time, it will feel like two pieces of a puzzle clicking together. I know I have a great destiny (as do all of you), but I truly believe that whoever I am meant to be with will make it greater. He’ll make ME greater. Just as I’ll make him greater. He won’t complete me…but complement me in the best possible ways. Call me a naïve, hopeless romantic, but I do believe in soulmates. I believe I have one somewhere. And all I can really do is trust God to bring him across my path when I’m most ready for him. If I’m really lucky, maybe it will look a little something like this:
“And then you run into him on Seventh Avenue as you’re buying diced cantaloupe, and pow, you are known, you are recognized, the both of you. You both find the exact same things worth remembering. You have the same rhythm. Click. You just know each other. All of a sudden you see reading in bed and waffles on Sunday and laughing at nothing and his mouth on yours. And it’s so far beyond fine that you know you can never go back to fine. That fast. You think: Oh, here is the rest of my life. It’s finally arrived.” ~Gillian Flynn
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I would like to meet ya
1. Someone who loves God and has a close relationship with him
2. Someone who can make me laugh
3. Someone who respects the three major things in a relationship faithfulness, honesty, and commitment
4. Someone who can be my best friend
Wonderful. I’ve been waiting all day to read yours! I wish I’d thought of #3 🙂
http://tangentoffthelifeline.wordpress.com/2013/10/11/day-8-five-to-wish-on/
This is so me! Exactly what I’m looking and praying for too!
http://wp.me/p1gC0L-1o
that is the same kind of man I want
This web site is a blessing, ive been a single mother for 12 years ans i am ready. I know that God has my soulmate , and we haven’t met yet. He is preparing us both.
thank you so much for this web site and your book
i love this.
here’s mine 🙂
http://impetuousofinsights.blogspot.com/2013/10/thesw30-day08-five-things-that-are-most.html
I totally agree with you Mandy! A man who is God-fearing will definitely be conscious and mostly be aware of what he does. 🙂 and a man who loves his family especially his mom, will be a great family man someday! 🙂
Wonderful….seemed applies to me as well. Can I repost it on my fb? Thanks and have a great great day !
I like that,Mandy..A guy who love God,love to dance and can make me laugh. I’m also a hopeless romantic like you,if my future husband already find me,I will let you know : )
I love this post! well, I do love all of the blogs… but this one makes me really think what I really want for my future mate, which I haven’t thought of that well before… now I did make my list today. 😀
I love your comment Mandy about the creative outlet! It totally makes sense to see the world through the same lens!..Thanks for sharing! here’s mine @www.simplybecome.org
Five Things My Future Spouse Needs To Be:
http://baredmysoul.blogspot.com/2013/10/five-things-my-future-spouse-needs-to-be.html
1) (Definitely) Believe in the Holy trinity, and with it a love for God & commitment to Him(okay that can count as more than one, but oh well)
2)Able to cook (nothing fancy necessarily, but at least a few basic meals)
3) Love for healthy living
4) Respect & sympathy for other people
5) Patience (maybe he could help me, cos’ my patience level is not that great)
I love this question 🙂 to me the most important qualities for a mate would be: (in no real particular order, except the first!)
* someone that shares the same faith in God that I have, (as Mandy said – if he has a strong belief in God the other qualities like honestly, communication, faithfulness will fall into place)
* someone who’s funny who can make me laugh
* someone adventurous (I’ve been known for a lot of randomness in my life – getting off work on a Friday night or waking up on a Saturday morning, packing a bag then driving w/no plans, no map, no gps – just random driving looking at the world.)
* someone who’s family oriented – my family means a lot to me & even though we aren’t close in distance, we are extremely close. I speak to all my family daily (whether thru calls, text, or fb), so they must be close to their family. This family orient must also include their love for having a family of their own – even though I’m at the age where most likely I won’t be able to bare children myself, I have a deep love for kids and desire to be a foster parent. Therefore my mate must also share this love of kids/family
* someone who’s kind, romantic, creative. Someone who knows how to do the smallest things that mean the most – the little notes, the single flower on the steering wheel – someone who gives not in material or financial ways but has a creative soul to come up with their own little ways to show kindness/romance.
Love th quote at the end!!! And I wish I would’ve of thought to put “creative outlet”.
Mine top 5: http://imwinningipromise.blogspot.com/2013/10/five-things-that-are-most-important-to.html?m=1
1. some that loves and has a heart like God
2. Can make me laugh
3. Someone that can Cook ( lol )
4. some one that is spontaneous
5. communicates well
Five things that are important to me in a future mate:
1. Someone who believes in a higher being which is God.
2. Someone that is spontaneous/adventurous, i love to do things at the spare of the moment and i love to travel.
3. Family oriented, family means everything to me, i have the closest relationship with my family and to have someone that shares the same values as i do on family is a plus.
4. Ambitious, I love someone with a drive an wants to keep climbing an not stop.
5.Understanding.
1. Must be God fearing, 2. Must be disciplined and hardworking, 3. Must be a good listener, 4. Must make me laugh
Very intersting. I think i would start my own blogging challenge too. I + perfectl agree with ur #1 that is my first too. 😉
Mandy,
I totally agree with you on the dancing thing! I dated a guy who loved to dance and had similar tastes in music as me (classic rock and indie rock). Although we broke up, I still smile about the memories we shared of going out dancing, listening to music together, and just enjoying being ourselves. I love to laugh and feel comfortable with my significant other. I hope I meet a man someday who isn’t afraid to get up and dance! 🙂
The five most important things for me in a mate:
1. Someone who believes Christian doctrine, and then lives like it. A man who claims to be a Christian but lacks integrity in dealing with other people is a big turn off, and it describes several men I have dated.
2. Someone who loves to dance! I recently started taking lessons, and I never feel as alive as I do when I am dancing!
3. Someone who loves animals! I just have a hard time trusting someone who doesn’t like little furry things that have no other goal in life but to love you. Besides that, I have a dog that I love more than any man I have ever dated. He has to know that I have a ridiculous love of animals.
4. Someone who loves family. Just because I don’t have kids of my own doesn’t let him off the hook. I have a mess of nieces and nephews who mean the world to me!
5. Someone who is supportive. In the past few years I have faced deaths of loved ones, not to mention facing my own mortality in the form of a cancer diagnosis. If I can’t have a man willing to hold me when I feel like I am falling apart, then I would rather be alone.
1) Loves God. A man after God’s own heart. With this, everything else will fall in line.
2) smart. I love a well dressed man who smells nice!
3) Family oriented. Someone who’s willing to join my family and also start a family with me. He should also have a relationship with his family.
4) Funny and Understanding. A guy who will find my twisted sense of humor amusing.
5) Adventurous
1) Someone who is spiritual
2) Family oriented (HUGE family and I love every single one of them <3 )
3) Has to be their own person (this would cover everything from being able to make up their own mind and not letting anyone else influence them.)
4) Confident
5) Completely and utterly but so sweetly flawed but mine and mine alone 😉
1 Tim 6:11 man, family -oriented, communicator, strong, driven, passionate, active, creative, funny, health conscious, romantic, non-judgmental, forever learning and seeking knowledge.
Oh I went on a tangent..I was supposed to only have 5..lol. 1Tim 6:11 man, family oriented, active, communicator, funny.
Well I actually have a list of about 150 things .. haha.. but i have narrowed it down to exactly five things
1. He has to be a christian and goes to church on a regular basis and loves the lord and is willing to serve him
2. he has to have a great personality
3 he has to have a great sense of humor
4. he has to have a good education .. i am not as harsh on this one as i was, but education is a good thing to have
5. he has to be clean cut – i am not into guys with tattoos, piercings, and the like .. i like someone that is pretty clean and kinda like the boy next door 🙂 or the all american boy 🙂
this is what i have been looking for .. for probably about 10 to almost 15 years … i have come close, but God knows when he is ready for me to be with the one meant for me .. 🙂
1. Makes me a priority
2. Committed to our relationship
3. Loyal
4. Works hard at chosen career
5. Would be a good father.
As the years go by and life changes, so does the “list”
http://mfiallo15.wordpress.com/2013/10/12/day-8-five-things-that-are-most-important-to-me-in-a-future-mate/
I am totally enjoying your posts and seeing my choices in a different light- thought they were too exacting
Mine would be
1- Love for God
2. Makes time for the relationship, is an honest communicator
3. Loves to make me smile
4. Loves to dance
5. Family oriented.
Not necessarily in that order
1. Loves God
2. Consistent
3. Repectful
4. Driven- Has goals and a leader
5. Sense of humor
1. God-fearing.
2. “My person” & I should also be “his person”. Which means an out of this world connection.
3. Intelligent.
4. Funny. I think this goes hand in hand with being spontaneous and having an edge.
5. Mutual attraction. I think it’s important for both of us to be insanely attracted to each other, both physically and personality-wise. It would keep the realationship going.
I had to add a sixth requirement because it’s soo important to me. He HAS to be SLOW TO ANGER. If there was 1.5 before going to no.2, then this would be it for me. I pray that we all get this qualities in our future men until then, we celebrate being single! Woo-hoo.
Anyone who wnt 2 call me here is my no 0613717743
love the quote that you ended this post with!
Here are my five things: http://christinamarieharris.blogspot.com/2013/10/five-things-that-are-most-important-to.html
1. Love God
2. Great sense of humor
3. Into the outdoors
4. Respect me (date me exclusively)
5. Smell and look good
He must
1. Love God, with all his heart, it takes a man that loves God to love a woman totally. And actually Love as christ loves the church.
2.Be honest and disciplined
3. Have d ability to communicate well
4. Fun loving
5.Have good listening skills
spiritual
loyal
sense of humor
family man
strong, confident, easy going
http://michelle-abundantlife.blogspot.com/2013/10/the-single-womans-30-day-blog-challenge_13.html
I love your list…especially the dance one! I have that on my personal list as well…I love to dance. Check out the 15 Non-Negotiables of Dating I received WAYYYY back in Jr. High:
http://meg-lifeandall.blogspot.com/2013/10/a-lesson-from-jr-high-on-dating.html
Here is my Day 8 post – http://clothedinlove.org/2013/10/13/top-5-must-haves-day-8/
http://40yearswandering.blogspot.com/2013/10/day-8-five-things-that-are-most.html
Thank you for your 30 day blog. It is coming at the perfect time! My big 30th birthday was last weekend and I had expectations of my boyfriend that he would make it great. I was wrong I didn’t even get a present. He did take me to a nice dinner though. I have spoken to him before about how important church is to me and that I wanted him to go with me so he can really see my heart and get to know all of me. Well he didn’t feel like going again this weekend (did I mention it was my 30th birthday!?) I was upset with him, I told him, him not going to church with me is eventually going to be a dealbreaker. The next day we spoke on the phone and we broke up. I say we, but it was more him saying maybe we aren’t a match and the distance is too hard. He lives 3 hours away. He stated he was sick of being a 3rd wheel during the week when his friends go out to dinner. I’ve been so heartbroken. I saw a future with him and could see myself marrying him, minus the not going to church. I need a MAN of Christ first and foremost. Anyway with my story I am saying thank you for starting this 30 day blog. He will soon realize that whoever he chooses to fill that empty seat at dinner with is exactly that….empty. The life he so badly wants is empty and he doesn’t realize it, I hate that for him and I hope he realizes it soon.
My Perfect Guys.. Love God first… His family, then his job. Can make me laugh, loves to live….
1.)loves God with all his heart,mind, and soul
2.) Loves to workout because fitness is my Passion
3.)Creative
4.) Adventurous and loves to travel
5.) Makes for laugh hysterically
http://mslafongibson.blogspot.com/
a man exactly like Boaz,( Read the book of Ruth)
1. A man from my Father’s clan i.e He loves God and He is known by God
2. A man of standing
3. Generous to breathtaking proportion
4.Intergrity..keep and protects me in the dark
5.Pay the full price to have me
1. Loves God. A man who answers to someone bigger than him is usually a better man.
2. Loves kids. I have 3.
3. Hunts
4. Taller than me. I’m 5’9. It just makes me feel safer.
5. Has character, morals and values.
6. A manly man.
http://tolaswalk.blogspot.co.uk/2013/10/five-most-important-things-you-want-in.html
http://leftbean.com/2013/10/15/the-single-womans-30-day-blogging-challenge-day-8/
If I were looking for a husband, I would want him to:
1) Love God MORE than I do.
2) Be compassionate and forgiving towards me and others.
3) Be a good provider. (Not making 6 figures, but having a sense of passion for whatever he chooses as his line of work.)
4) Be protective. (I absolutely LOVE when a man cares more about you more than his own life!)
5) A sweet, sincere smile! 🙂
This blog is my saving grace! If it wasn’t for knowing how many women out there are sharing the same feelings I have, I would be so lost! I know what I want from a man:
1- Family Oriented
2- Patient and Kind
3- Honest and Loyal
4- Makes me laugh
5- Spontaneous and loves to travel
I could go on and on forever about what I want from a man, I know we all could. But at this point it is about making ME a priority and hoping I meet a man who can handle that.
I have a non-negotiable traits before I entertain any suitor
1. He has to be God-fearing (sub-trait: he knows how to recite the rosary)
2. He must have no vices.
3. He must be responsible and and kind.
4. He must have a decent and stable job.
Here’s my blog response:
http://chicasoltera.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=72&action=edit&message=6&postpost=v2
http://ajourneythatlastsalifetime.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-single-woman-challenge-day-8.html
Thank you for reading :))
Here’s my list!
http://popcornandpurpleink.com/the-single-womans-blogging-challenge-day-8/
http://marlyisme.wordpress.com/2013/12/28/day-8-five-things-that-are-most-important-to-you-in-a-future-mate/
Here’s mine… And i have an incredibly long explanation.. 🙂
May we all find our one true love.
http://charmdogma.blogspot.com/2014/03/the-single-woman-30-day-blogging_7.html